Wolfdog jokes....

Juniorwolf · 09-10-2008, 23:20

A man takes his CSW to the vet. "My dog´s cross eyed. Is there anything you can do for him?" "Well," says the vet, "let´s have a look at him" So he picks the dog up and examines his eyes, then checks his teeth. Finally, he says "I´m going to have to put him down." "What? Because he´s cross-eyed?" "No, because he´s really heavy"

Juniorwolf · 09-10-2008, 23:23

A wife says to her husband one weekend morning, "I am so glad that our CSW is such a clever dog. He brings in the daily newspapers every morning." Her husband replies, "Well, lots of dogs can do that." The wife responded, "But we´ve never subscribed to any!"

Mikael · 09-10-2008, 23:25

Good jokes Rolf

/ Mikael

Juniorwolf · 09-10-2008, 23:27

A burglar breaks into a house and he can hear "Jesus is watching you" so he looks around and sees nothing. So he shrugs shoulder and goes on. Again he can hear "Jesus is watching you" so he looks again and can see a parrot. "OK, this is just a parrot" he murmurs and follows his business.
The parrot doesn´t give up and says ""Jesus is watching you" and the burglar loses his temper "I don´t care about Jesus"
"You should, Jesus is name of our CSW"

Juniorwolf · 09-10-2008, 23:46

A little man walks into a mafia-bar and nervously saying "sorry, but witch one of you own a the big Rottweiler who is tied up outside ?" the biggest and most evil looking mafia-type guy stands up and says "it is my dog, what is the problem ?" the little man says "I am very sorry, but I think my dog have killed your dog" the big and evil looking mafia-type guy says "what kind of dog do you have ?" the little man says "I have a 4 month old CSW" the big evil looking mafia-type guy says "how can my 55kg 3 years old Rottweiler be killed by your 4 month old CSW ?" the little man says "it was choking on it"

Juniorwolf · 10-10-2008, 00:13

A CSW and a GSD was walking in the forrest and suddently they meet a fairy how gave them 3 wishes each. The GSD said "I want to be the only male GSD in this area" the CSW said " I want a motorcycle" then the GSD said "I want to be the only male GSD in the whole country" then the CSW said "I want a helmet" the last wish from the GSD was "I want to be the only male GSD in the whole world" then the CSW said "I want the GSD to be gay" jumped on his motorcycle and drived away

Rona · 10-10-2008, 13:49

An authentic dialogue overheard at one of the CSVs meetings (conducted after a few beers

):

Person one: "My wolfdog has done something really embarassing, I feel most ashamed of him. Do you know what he did?"
Person two: "Pissed Oscar Dora's car?"

Rona · 17-09-2009, 09:26

It's not a joke, but a true story:
Returning from a walk through an almost empty park in the evening my husband and I decided to practise the recall command with Lorelei. We stayed at opposite sides of the lawn, called her and rewarded when she came running - a standard exercise, which went fine. Suddenly, when she was close to me, she changed the direction and to my horror I noticed a toddler running towards her, waving his hands and screaming loudly, uttering a kind of piercing sound, which only the under two-year-old can make.. I was 100% sure Lorka wouldn't hurt him (she loves kids), but her warm 'welcome' might give a shock to the parents, not to mention the boy...

Luckily, I managed to step on the leash in time and stoped her about 3-4 meters in front of the child. Nobody but me noticed the few-second incident - it looked as if the dog ran and suddenly stopped. Only when Lorka was under full control did I look at the boy's family, and I realised the grandfather (?) looked familiar... it was our Minister of Defence with his family.... and a few bodyguards, of course

I can imagine all the potential tabloid headings "The Minister's grandson attacked by a dangerous wolf!"

Weren't we lucky?

Our lesson: when the park seems to be empty, there may be 'dangerous ministers' walking there!

Grin · 17-09-2009, 09:43

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rona

I can imagine all the potential tabloid headings "The Minister's grandson attacked by a dangerous wolf!"

Weren't we lucky?

Oh yes, you were indeed.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rona

Our lesson: when the park seems to be empty, there may be 'dangerous ministers' walking there!

Quite right; whose child/grandchild but minister's could be so spoiled to behave like this?

Rona · 17-09-2009, 14:53

Quote:

Originally Posted by Grin

Quite right; whose child/grandchild but minister's could be so spoiled to behave like this?

I wouldn't be so hard on him

I think most kids behave this way at some point, and a young dog should be on a leash in the park

Anyway, Lorka would have probably ignored the child, like she was trained and normally does, but under the circumstances, I just didn't feel like testing it...

Grin · 17-09-2009, 15:46

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rona

I wouldn't be so hard on him

Yes, I know, in fact I'm not.

By the way I'm not sure, what Łowca would have done in such a situation.

Maybe ignored, and maybe... not.

I've noticed that after dark he behaves in a little different way than normally. Night mode on?

Vaiva · 17-09-2009, 21:21

When Brukne was still a very young girl I was telling my friends that she is so special, because she never begs for food and has no "dying deer's look" and one friend of mine said "Yes, she doesn't beg for food. She TAKES it herself"

Sad thing it was all true...

Angelika · 18-09-2009, 09:18

Quote:

Originally Posted by Vaiva

"Yes, she doesn't beg for food. She TAKES it herself"

Yes

Nebulosa · 19-09-2009, 00:16

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rona

I noticed a toddler running towards her, waving his hands and screaming loudly, uttering a kind of piercing sound, which only the under two-year-old can make..

In truth, we have no doubts about who must be at leash in public places

09-10-2008, 23:20	#1
Juniorwolf Member Join Date: Feb 2005 Posts: 575	Wolfdog jokes.... A man takes his CSW to the vet. "My dog´s cross eyed. Is there anything you can do for him?" "Well," says the vet, "let´s have a look at him" So he picks the dog up and examines his eyes, then checks his teeth. Finally, he says "I´m going to have to put him down." "What? Because he´s cross-eyed?" "No, because he´s really heavy"

09-10-2008, 23:25	#3
Mikael Scandinavian Member Join Date: Dec 2007 Location: Stockholm Posts: 1,089	Good jokes Rolf / Mikael __________________ _________________________________________________ Hronec, Rasty, Zilja Kennel, Wolfdog of Sweden* http://kennelwolfdogofsweden.vpsite.se/Home.html http://www.facebook.com/pages/Wolfdo...53067971392916 Last edited by Mikael; 09-10-2008 at 23:29.

09-10-2008, 23:46	#5
Juniorwolf Member Join Date: Feb 2005 Posts: 575	A little man walks into a mafia-bar and nervously saying "sorry, but witch one of you own a the big Rottweiler who is tied up outside ?" the biggest and most evil looking mafia-type guy stands up and says "it is my dog, what is the problem ?" the little man says "I am very sorry, but I think my dog have killed your dog" the big and evil looking mafia-type guy says "what kind of dog do you have ?" the little man says "I have a 4 month old CSW" the big evil looking mafia-type guy says "how can my 55kg 3 years old Rottweiler be killed by your 4 month old CSW ?" the little man says "it was choking on it" Last edited by Juniorwolf; 09-10-2008 at 23:50.

10-10-2008, 13:49	#7
Rona Distinguished Member Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: Kraków Posts: 3,509	An authentic dialogue overheard at one of the CSVs meetings (conducted after a few beers ): Person one: "My wolfdog has done something really embarassing, I feel most ashamed of him. Do you know what he did?" Person two: "Pissed Oscar Dora's car?" __________________

17-09-2009, 09:26	#8
Rona Distinguished Member Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: Kraków Posts: 3,509	It's not a joke, but a true story: Returning from a walk through an almost empty park in the evening my husband and I decided to practise the recall command with Lorelei. We stayed at opposite sides of the lawn, called her and rewarded when she came running - a standard exercise, which went fine. Suddenly, when she was close to me, she changed the direction and to my horror I noticed a toddler running towards her, waving his hands and screaming loudly, uttering a kind of piercing sound, which only the under two-year-old can make.. I was 100% sure Lorka wouldn't hurt him (she loves kids), but her warm 'welcome' might give a shock to the parents, not to mention the boy... Luckily, I managed to step on the leash in time and stoped her about 3-4 meters in front of the child. Nobody but me noticed the few-second incident - it looked as if the dog ran and suddenly stopped. Only when Lorka was under full control did I look at the boy's family, and I realised the grandfather (?) looked familiar... it was our Minister of Defence with his family.... and a few bodyguards, of course I can imagine all the potential tabloid headings "The Minister's grandson attacked by a dangerous wolf!" Weren't we lucky? Our lesson: when the park seems to be empty, there may be 'dangerous ministers' walking there! __________________ Last edited by Rona; 17-09-2009 at 09:30.

09-10-2008, 23:23	#2
Juniorwolf Member Join Date: Feb 2005 Posts: 575	A wife says to her husband one weekend morning, "I am so glad that our CSW is such a clever dog. He brings in the daily newspapers every morning." Her husband replies, "Well, lots of dogs can do that." The wife responded, "But we´ve never subscribed to any!"

09-10-2008, 23:27	#4
Juniorwolf Member Join Date: Feb 2005 Posts: 575	A burglar breaks into a house and he can hear "Jesus is watching you" so he looks around and sees nothing. So he shrugs shoulder and goes on. Again he can hear "Jesus is watching you" so he looks again and can see a parrot. "OK, this is just a parrot" he murmurs and follows his business. The parrot doesn´t give up and says ""Jesus is watching you" and the burglar loses his temper "I don´t care about Jesus" "You should, Jesus is name of our CSW"

10-10-2008, 00:13	#6
Juniorwolf Member Join Date: Feb 2005 Posts: 575	A CSW and a GSD was walking in the forrest and suddently they meet a fairy how gave them 3 wishes each. The GSD said "I want to be the only male GSD in this area" the CSW said " I want a motorcycle" then the GSD said "I want to be the only male GSD in the whole country" then the CSW said "I want a helmet" the last wish from the GSD was "I want to be the only male GSD in the whole world" then the CSW said "I want the GSD to be gay" jumped on his motorcycle and drived away

17-09-2009, 21:21	#12
Vaiva ir Brukne Join Date: May 2006 Location: Vilnius Posts: 1,768	When Brukne was still a very young girl I was telling my friends that she is so special, because she never begs for food and has no "dying deer's look" and one friend of mine said "Yes, she doesn't beg for food. She TAKES it herself" Sad thing it was all true... __________________ Walkiria Girios dvasia